We are immortal spiritual beings living a temporary human experience, and yet as we grow up in this physical life we learn to identify with our thoughts, emotions, experiences, labels, body and so on. If we were to peel back the layers of this false sense of ‘self’ that we have identified with through time, right at the core of ourselves we would find a divine being, one that does not see itself as distinct, different or separate from anything in this universe.
Before I begin I must start by explaining that this is just one interpretation of the integration of the ego and it is by no means an absolutist viewpoint. Please take from this only with which you resonate and understand that there is no right or wrong.
Working with and confronting the ego can be a challenging step on our spiritual journey. I have personally endured frequent pain and commotion in my life since I have shined the light on my ego. It turns out that the hardest part of transformation can be to let go of the old ‘self’, yet the butterfly must look at itself in a different way.
The earth and its inhabitants are currently going through a transformation otherwise known as the ascension process. As we shift from a third dimensional existence into fourth and fifth, we go through an alchemical process internally, our body is moving from a carbon-based structure to a crystalline silicon structure. In these higher frequencies, the duality within the third dimension begins to disintegrate and our higher self begins to merge with our ego (lower self).
During spiritual awakening, we wake up to the illusion of separateness and as we shine the light of awareness directly upon the ego, it begins to surface more than ever as if it is fighting for its survival. We may then begin manifesting life dramas that trigger the ego to the surface and leave us with heavy emotions such as; shame, frustration, boredom, guilt, apathy, embarrassment, fear etc. Such situations we find ourselves in can be painful when our ego is the one that is bruised, yet these times present incredible opportunities to really learn to observe the ego and increase our overall awareness of it.
Accept and Nurture
On my journey with the ego through awakening, I became more and more aware of its place in my thoughts and conversation. I set the intention to catch the triggers and stop the words before they came out of my mouth. Unfortunately, I had been in resistance to the ego and as you know, what you resist persists! Much to my despair, it got louder and angrier, it was as if it was fighting back, I had made an enemy of the ego. This led me to one of the biggest lessons I have learnt on my journey with the ego so far, we cannot tame human ego by suppressing it, we must instead shine the light of awareness onto it.
The ego is essential for most of us in our reality at this time, without it, we would not be able to navigate through the physical dimension as we do, it also serves as protection and aids with spiritual growth. Acceptance of the ego is first of all necessary to prevent creating a negative and therefore problematic relationship with it. In order to cultivate self love, we must learn to love every single aspect of ourself. After all, it is along for the ride whilst we are here and very few of us wake up enlightened, for most of us the merging of the ego with the higher self is a gradual process. So it seems that we can choose to accept the ego and even befriend it to prevent resistance and make the process smoother.
I would go so far as to suggest trying to empathise with the ego and express your inner nurturing parent. Your ego is going through its own transformational process too. You may wish to imagine it like a young child, scared and insecure, it is an entity in and of itself and it wants to hold on. Explain to your ego that it is merging with the light and give it some unconditional love and compassion.
‘Instead of trying to let go, just love the one who still holds on’ – Matt Khan
Recognising the Ego
After peering into our belief systems and forming a healthy relationship with our ego, we can shine the light of awareness onto it by recognising when we are acting from ego-consciousness. It is important to remember that much of our ego is healthy and essential in this lifetime. Below is a list of examples of some unhealthy ego ‘traps’ that we may fall into on a daily basis;
· The need to be ‘right’ or in control.
· Rigid belief systems and not being open to other’s personal truths.
· Living in the past and future.
· Comparing ourselves to others and feeling a sense of competition.
· Worrying about what others think.
· The need to stand out or BE someone.
· Expecting perfection.
· The need for security and permanence.
· Boredom.
· Being overly identified with our belongings, profession, appearance etc..
As you read the words above you may feel slight unrest in the depths of your being as the ego is penetrated with the light of awareness. The ego does not want to be recognised and integrated and yet the process has already begun.
Try not to judge yourself when you recognise your egoic tendencies, this only fuels it more! Every time we are caught up in these moments we are creating an illusion of separation between us, and the rest of humanity. Once we strip away our physical identity, we see that we all divine souls on a journey and everyone is doing the best they can.
Becoming the Observer
Once our awareness of our ego-consciousness shifts to higher levels, we can begin to recognise it more often by inviting in our true self and becoming the observer of our minds. We are not our thoughts; in fact, we are the awareness behind the thoughts and when we are deep in the mind, we are lost in the illusion, we are identifying and therefore the voices we hear in our head are the ego itself.
In my experience, meditation is the best way to develop more personal observation and just 10 minutes a day is enough to make big changes in your life. Throughout time you will begin to adopt more of an observational standpoint during the day as you become aware of your thoughts and emotions. With more overall awareness comes more recognition of the ego traps we fall into.
Not only do we become the silent observer of the ego, we also begin to conceptualise what it means to be more than just our thoughts and emotions as we really get a glimpse of the divine spark within us. These states of awareness come sprinkled with beautiful gifts, as we are occasionally able to step out of our pain and observe it from a place of non-attachment.
As we become more efficient at catching ourselves in unnecessary thought patterns, we find comfort in redirecting ourselves to the present moment. In this safe space, our ego will quickly try and distract us from the present moment by casting us into the past and future or perhaps a sense of ‘boredom’ will rise within us. This is simply the ego holding on because, in the present moment, ego-consciousness no longer exists. In the now, we do not identify and we fall out of the illusion of separation.
As our practice grows over time, we invite more expansion into our lives and the gaps between our thoughts begin to widen, here we begin to make space for more of our true self to reside. When we quieten our thoughts through presence, we quieten the ego and when we observe our thoughts we become more efficient at observing the ego and being present with it.
Now that you have shined the light of awareness onto the ego and you are beginning to recognise it, it is no longer the ego at all since you have begun to stop identifying with it. Instead, you are merely acting in accordance with conditioned responses and emotional patterns that you have acquired over the years. Presence, time and the power of intention will aid in breaking these habits. Eventually, ego-based thoughts and emotional patterns will gradually fall away. Ultimately the situations that once triggered our ego will no longer trigger us to begin with because we have naturally allowed the ego to merge with the light and our ideal self can now take the reins.
The Ideal Self
We may choose to create an ‘ideal self’ whilst progressing on our journey of self-development. The ‘ideal self’ can be used to propel ourselves forward as we strive to become the best person we can be.
On my journey with the ego, I began experiencing an identity crisis. My idea of ‘self’ began to disintegrate and fall away and I began to integrate a new awareness into every inch of my being. This process is painful and confusing as much of the unhealthy ego-based identity dissolved or integrated with the higher self. I realised I was saying goodbye to who I used to be and a new ‘self’ was being born.
When we shine the divine light of awareness onto the ego, we begin to ‘see’ more into the aspects of us that no longer serve us. Gradually we begin to stop identifying with this ‘old’ version of ourselves and we welcome a new one that is more in alignment with who our true self wants to be. Importantly we must let the old ‘self’ go and understand that we will never be that person again.
On our path, we may choose to allow our new self to emerge naturally or we may wish to recreate ourselves in accordance with our ‘ideal self’. Now the process of letting go of the old ‘self’ becomes increasingly more beautiful as we are able to design our character traits and become the person that we want to be, through exercising our true power as the creator of our reality.
You may be thinking surely this is another form of ‘ego’ and by creating an ‘ideal self’ we are simply perpetuating the ego and you would be correct in thinking this. However, we must remember that the goal is to not destroy the ego as it has its purpose and cannot be considered as totally negative. In this time-space reality, our ego will remain with us throughout our life (unless it is your goal to remove it completely). We can, therefore, channel the energy of identification within us into using it in a benevolent way. The ‘ideal self’ is something that we are trying to build with our ego self, this is partly why a totally negative belief of the ego can be detrimental.
When designing our ‘ideal self’ we may wish to fully tune into our connection with our higher self and bring into reality what our divinity is truly asking for. This may include incorporating particular character traits such as; unconditionally loving, harmless and nurturing. Our ‘ideal self’ may include physical attributes such as good health and youthfulness and it may also include our dreams of living out our purpose. The ‘ideal self’ is a goal, it is something that you envision in the safety of your own mind. Spend time contemplating this version of yourself, how would they react in certain social scenarios? We must take action to build this person that we want to become and over time we gradually shift into this new ‘self’. Now we can watch as we gradually grow and evolve to become our greatest version.
The ‘ideal self’ is something that we are already in the process of creating whenever we strive to become more one with the light. By consciously creating the ‘ideal self’ it can now become our compass, guiding and moving us forward on our journey of self-mastery. As we recreate ourselves within the eyes of our divinity and gradually step into the best person we can be, we must remember to be flexible. We must not get attached to this version of our self and understand that our ‘ideal self’ will constantly be changing along with our consciousness as it continues to evolve.
Spiritual Ego
“The biggest ego trip going is getting rid of your ego” – Alan Watts
An article regarding ego would not be complete without a quick mention of the phenomenon of ‘spiritual ego’. As we shine the light of awareness onto the ego it is necessary to be mindful of a powerful sense of ‘self’ that may be quietly forming in the background only to suddenly erupt full force!
The spiritual ego can begin to form as we come into new states of awareness about reality and who we are. Before long we may find ourselves judging those that are not on a similar path and a sense of superiority may arise, this is a delusion. As we expand our awareness of the ego we must not trick ourselves into believing that we are in any way superior to the souls that we interact with on a daily basis. Some common spiritual ego traps are as follows;
· Thinking we have all the answers.
· Dogmatic in our beliefs and unwilling to listen to other spiritual concepts.
· Judging others that are not as ‘spiritually advanced’ in our eyes.
· Excessive positivity.
· Thinking it is up to us to save the world – (The messiah complex).
If we catch ourselves in a moment of spiritual ego we may wish to remember that we are all ‘one’ and equal in this universe and when we peer into the eyes of another we are seeing into a divine being that is a complete reflection of us in every way.
Final Words
Although a journey with the ego can act as a rollercoaster that propels us through the highs and lows of transformation, suppressing the ego can make for an even bumpier ride! By shining the light of awareness onto ego-consciousness, a true sense of freedom will gradually emerge.
Once we address our belief systems about the ego and create a healthy relationship with it, we no longer view identity consciousness as something that we should battle and eliminate. We are then given the opportunity to be present and observe our ego. As the observer, we recognise when we are acting from a place of separation consciousness and with the light of awareness shining on it, it begins to lose its power and the illusion of identification is replaced with the realisation of oneness. We can then go forward and create our ‘ideal self’ based on our natural drive to become a living embodiment of the light, ultimately merging our lower self with our higher self and disintegrating duality.
When we set the intention to merge our ego with our higher self, we automatically choose love over fear, we choose oneness over separation and we choose light over dark. This only creates heightened levels of bliss and overall happiness in our lives. As our awareness grows, integration of ego takes place and we move into higher vibrational frequencies where duality does not exist. As a result, we become beings of light that walk the planet, spreading only love as we feel a true sense of connection with all that is.
With Gratitude 🙂
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